Fucking Nightmares

My dreams have changed again; for a while now the buildings have been gone and it’s only occasionally at the beachfront battle any more. It’s mostly deep in the middle of the ocean or the bay. It’s dangerous under the water and filled with things that try to eat people, and the strange ships are still on the surface. The storm tiger and celestial bear are fighting creatures on the rocky bay shore, but the winged fire wolf sleeps in his den as it’s night. The Night Mother – the Great Celestial Bear of the Night – roars defiantly on the distant shore. Her coat twinkles like diamonds floating in the stormy black-and-blue sea. Right now I’m human, and I’m trying not to drown, or get eaten by the water shades. They’re all murky, black, menacing, snapping strikers with razor maws; from minnows to whale sharks, all fish have become vicious, soul-hungry shades.

But it’s only been since I started listening to different music, the last four days or so, that it’s changed.

I hear music in my dreams now. Particularly: Psychosocial (by Slipknot), Holy Diver (Killswitch Engage), and a couple of others that I’ve forgotten now. And when I hear it the shit really hits the fan.

I know I’ve taken the form of the tiger before. I was aided by a mysterious figure I met at the forest’s edge during the months of the beach slaughter. He said that we – the sabertooth and I – were kindred spirits, forever bound and joined. The tiger is the first of my several allies including the bear and wolf, but first I must master my own form for them to see me. The shaman – as accurate a word I can ascribe – wasn’t human, but he was humanoid. No language was used, just a mutual knowing. Benevolence assured. But still I remember the feeling. I remember the sensation of having paws, a tail, whiskers, everything.

I have dreamed of the blue dragon in the past, usually in the Otherworld. They’re the only peaceful dreams I have. And she’s always resting, sleeping, hibernating almost. A glade in the forest: blue crystalline weeping willows with unimaginably pure white flowers; deep emerald green river circling the blue grassy island she sleeps on; small silvery fish leaping in and out of the water. She is a water deity’s avatar, a powerful elemental spirit. She commands the oceans, hurricanes, typhoons; but also the gentle, cleansing, healing rain.

The music in my dreams wakes her, and she is enraged. The shades must be destroyed. I am the dragon, and the music gives me infinite power… the dream ends after I wipe them from existence.

Sorry to cut it short. Valiuming out.

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